Beth Ditto Should Have Been In TLC

So at Hoboken the only thing I listen to in the mornings are 90's r&b girl groups and Gossip. The Gossip cover of "Are You That Somebody" has become something of an obsession for me and leads into todays post.

After watching the official music video for "No Scrubs" I have decided to create a color palette map of nine screen shots from the video.

And then an analogous color study of the screen shots:

And then, some artsy-fartsy hipster bullshit:

M.I.A and Lady Gaga don't have shit on these O.G. Bitches:

All Bike and All Beer Makes Julia Not Post

So the past two days I haven't posted because I've been busy riding my bike and avoiding life. On Thursday was the Skellies ride and I did this real quick before I rode 20 miles.

This was the map from the Chronicle of all the Bike To Work Day breakfast and afternoon stations.  I just took some fabric paint and made a route of all the places I wanted to go to. Places that my friends work at, play at, or just think are just plain awesome.

Friday was the official Bike To Work Day, and unfortunately there was too much beer and not enough daylight. I made it to about half of them with my room mate Sara and neighbor Adrian. The day went perfectly. Everyone was afraid about the rain threatening Austin with the impending "rapture." The hipster gods smiles kindly on the city that day and it didn't start pouring down until we were on our way home. We did have to sit out the rain for a little bit, conveniently the weather struck down hard right in front of Jackalope.  The evening ended perfectly with neighbors, Totinos pizza and Repo Man.

This is the map of the actual route I took for Bike to Beer Day:

I have been really obsessed with cooper std type with an electric urine fill. I just want Toxic Avenger to happen in real life. Really I should just be a 12 year-old boy in the mid-80's. All these circles are just starting to look like pepperonis. 

Audi 5000.

Gettin' Paid 2 Ride

So, today was really slow at work and I got to go ride around Austin and do some flyer-ing for Hoboken. I took my main route that I always take to get anywhere north. It was overcast today, but by the time I headed out on my route it was just sunny and humid as hell.


The one thing you can count on in Austin, is that everyday of the summer, everyone has that permanent layer of sweat on the back of their neck that never goes away. Everyone is half naked and the only decisions that are made are very poor ones. I wouldn't choose to live any other place in the world.

Part Two: The Ways In Which You Understand

Generalization: Eliminate characteristics of the mapped object that are not relevant to the map's purpose and reduce the complexity of the characteristics that will be mapped. The next image has also combined aspects of map design, which orchestrates the elements of the map to best convey its message to its audience. So here we go:

Really, am I that chick who's into cartography?

Yes.
Shit.

I find it very strange, and honestly kind of creepy, that I've become obsessed with a study that aided in the earths raping by the western hemisphere. I also find my life choices quite baffling sometimes. For some strange reason I thought it would be a logical idea to design a map, for 365 days in a row, with no experience or any basic knowledge of the process.

Thanks to the internet, I figured out there is a process. I'll make an attempt to be legit. I wouldn't really trust that this information is legit, but it seems like a logical one anyway.  It's divided into four categories, map agenda, map projections, generalization and map design. On another note, 4 is my favorite number, it's the smallest square number besides 1 and my fourth birthday was the best birthday of my life. I had a mermaid cake because my mom is awesome.

I feel like I should share my work area with everyone, I'm still not used to this "studio/office" thing yet. So here we are, The Desk.

Map Agenda. Select the traits of the object to be mapped. Here we go. Laptop, camera, battery charger, flash drive, phone, debit card, quarter, two pieces of cat food, water cups for paint times 5, pencil box with swedish fish sticker, cat food container, sketchbook, empty bowl of yogurt and granola from this morning, empty, pink plastic pterodactyl, binder from american history last semester and a random denim scrap from my recently sacrificed pair of jorts. Oh and a burrito that I'm about to eat. Right. Now.

Map Projections. How does one represent the terrain of the mapped area? I like this. I pretend that I'm my little plastic pterodactyl's eye balls.

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Part Two: Tomorrow!

the front

This is a map of my front yard. It is pathetic, mind you. A small rosemary and zandunga plant are my most recent acquisitions from my landlord as a feeble attempt to raise the property value. On one side is a random plastic bowl left by a construction worker while they were spraying my house for lead paint last winter.

I love my garden. It is sad and small and perfectly wonderful. My roommates dogs, Charlie and Leveau, chase each other in circles at amazing speeds, loop after loop, just like Quetzalcoatl and Tecciztecatl. In the morning my street smells of nothing but bacon and egg tacos. The same small dogs yap at me every morning, and it's the most fantastic thing in the world. 

Anatomy of Science

Because this is my first post, my brain is a little rickety. Obviously, I make pizza for a living and this is a map of pizza. I've asked myself many times what would be"the point" of dedicating an entire year to map making. I honestly think it's the only thing that will keep my brain from exploding from organizing lists to infinity and getting completely lost in all the information.

I don't know a thing about surveying, cartography or even college algebra. The only thing I know about geography is the flattest, quickest ways to get around Austin by bicycle. Most of my friends could totally school me in this any day of the week.

I guess I'm still trying to figure my brain out, even after a quarter century, I'm not quite sure what it's got in store for me. But, it's doing a pretty good job so far, so I guess I'll shut my mouth and make some pizza.